This is my attempt to show you what an ordinary day at a Children's home may be like. I've taken the perspective of what it's like to be one of the highschool girls at my home. I hope you will notice the similarities and difference between a normal child growing up with a family and one at a home. Notice the difference in freedom and the attitude that they are presented with. I guess the point is for you all to "see" more of what I saw and that your prayers for the children will become more personal. thanks for reading.
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It’s 5:30 am and you know you have to finish your cleaning duty and wash up before going outside for the daily morning meeting outside by 6. Otherwise, Dad (the director) is going to make us go back and clean up. But you’re so tired…the girls in your room were up late last night talking. You’ve told them a few times before, but it’s no use and you’d rather not get into a fight.
The dorm mom is now coming into the room nagging us to get up. No morning hugs or kisses nor gentle words to get ready, just the ever repeated “Get up! Hurry! get up!” in an annoyed tone. No use for asking for 5 more minutes, it’s just going to get you another earful.
Now you’re outside. As always, the youngest of the kids are out first—they are still afraid of getting into trouble from their dorm moms—then the middle schooler then the high schoolers. The college kids are the last ones to finally drag themselves out of their blankets; they’re far too used to the punishments to let that get in the way of more sleep. Everyone gets into single file lines according to the suite that they sleep in. Dad takes roll-call to check if everyone is accounted for aka no one has run off in the night or sleeping in. Those caught sleeping-in or doing something that ticks off Dad have to stay in push-up positions for at least 5 minutes—no mercy. Finally, after the last bit of chastisement and morning exercises, you have to hurry down to help serve breakfast.
You line up for food with your compartmentalized tray. It’s not bad food but since you really have no choice in the menu sometimes you wish you could ask for what you want. Either way, you have to eat quickly. The morning meeting went extra long today and has cut into your getting-ready time.
You go upstairs to get dressed for school. You hope that the uniform skirt you hand washed yesterday is at least damp-dry to wear for today. But at least you have a clean shirt in your closet to wear… wait… where is it?! After searching everywhere and asking all the girls (of course they’d deny it) you’ll just have to wear the same one you wore yesterday. You just hope that they haven’t gone through any of your other stuff—nothing is really safe and the rule of “finders keepers” apply everywhere in the home. Cranky from the morning, you sign yourself out in the office and say bye to no one in particular. It’s not like anyone is waving goodbye at you at the door but it’s just become habit.
After taking the subway to school, you run through to the gates and barely make it. You sit through class paying attention to the subjects you like and sleeping through the ones you don’t care for. Sometimes you wake up to see other kids feverishly taking notes—studying is for such kids as these, not for you. Your plan is to start making money straight out of high school and get out of the home asap—forget college.
School is over and your friends ask you if they can come over to your place this time. You make up a reason why they can’t—they don’t know you’re from a children’s home and best to keep it that way. After hanging out a little with friends eating ddukbokee, you take your time coming home—nothing to really look forward to and it’ll be cleaning time soon at the home. You’re in no hurry.
When you arrive, the other girls in the suite have cleaned somewhat. You hopingly look to see if there are any leftover snacks—but you’re disappointed to find that it’s only some boiled potatoes. You contemplate going to the convenient store nearby but decide not to all you have to last you for the rest of the week is a few bucks.You change into the same shirt and pants you’ve been wearing at home for the past few years—although you live surrounded by boys of your age in the home looking good is never something that is sought after or expected.
Depending on how fast you finish the serving chore and eating, you have a little bit of free time before the office shuts off the internet for the daily study period. You hurry up to your suite to grab a seat on the computer. Someone else is on the good computer so you take the one next to it. The monitor is from circa 1990s—the ones shaped liked a box and protruding out—and the system will shut down randomly depending on its mood. After checking a few things on the web, you are pushed off by another one of the girls for taking her spot on the waitlist. You forgot to sign up in the morning so you have nothing to say and sulk off into your room. There really isn’t much to do in the room other than look over the few possessions you have for the thousandth time or lay down and sleep.
The PA comes on to announce that it’s independent study time. Honestly, no one really studies in the home but since the internet has been turned off and no one is allowed to go out, all that anyone does is fall asleep at their desk, read comic books or listen to their mp3. The dorm mom randomly pops in to make sure we are doing something productive but it’s really no use since we just go right back to doing what we were previously doing. It’s hard to grab hold of someone who can help with the assignments since the dorm moms are always busy and plus what’s the point? It’s not like you’re going to make it big with studying anyway. Even if you were to get into college, who’s going to pay for the tuition? It’s better to just get by and not flunk so that you can get a job somewhere quick. Then finally your life at this home will be over!
Study period is finally over and you’re looking forward to watching your favorite drama on TV. But the girls are divided—half of you want to watch the drama you’re dying to watch and the other half wants to watch something else. And like everything else, the final decision is made by rock-paper-scissors. Fortunately, your side wins and you can watch TV in peace. At that moment, the dorm mom approaches demanding that you clean the sink right this minute. You were planning on doing it after dinner but forgot and now she’s up on your grill about it. “Clean it now or else!” she says. After putting up a losing fight, you stomp over to the sink to clean grumbling the whole time—why couldn’t she have waited until after the show was over, why is it always “do it right now!”
The TV show is over and now the battle starts to be the first one to use the bathroom. There’s only one bathroom per suite for 8 girls plus dorm mom. While you’re washing up, one of the girls bangs on the door to be let in…she says it’s an emergency and she has to go. Really, there is no privacy around here. Even when you’re feeling frustrated or just wanting to be by yourself, there is always someone in the room or you never know when someone will just barge in. And if you were to ask to go out, you’d have to tell the office when you’ll be back, who you’ll be with, why you are going. Everything must have permission and freedom is a luxury you often don’t see around here. You can’t wait until you’re done with high school so you can get out of this frustrating place.
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